Buzz Light Year

“The concept of a light-year is incomprehensible to me,” Buzz said.

“It is simply the distance light travels in a year,” the teacher said.

“How far in miles is that?” Buzz said.

“Well,” the teacher said. “It travels 186,282 miles per second. So multiply that by the number of seconds in a year.”

“My curiosity doesn’t reach that far?” Buzz said.

“Without curiosity you can expect to explore little in your life,” the teacher said. “I want you to think in the realms of possibilities and things people never think about. I want you to make something of yourself. Don‘t you ever think about being able to go faster than light? Man has advanced, because he thinks in terms of pushing the limits of the limitless.”

“So I’m going to end up flipping burgers or living under a bridge just because I don’t want to go the speed of light?” Buzz said.

“No,” the teacher said. “By no means; you should know about the constants in the universe. It will make you a more complete person. You must work with those constants. They unlock the secrets of the universe.”

“Is some light faster than other light?” Buzz asked.

“That’s a question that leads to nowhere,” the teacher said.

“Is there speed bumps in space or some continuum someplace that can slow light down?” Buzz said.

“Why would you want to know that and if you were able to find such a phenomena of what value would it be to you?” the teacher said.

“I don’t know,” Buzz said. “I’m just being curios and you’re slowing me down.”

“I’m just trying to teach you something,” the teacher said.

“I thought you were trying to awaken my curiosity so I could explore the realms of the unknown,” Buzz said.

“You are exploring the realms of the ridiculous,” the teacher said.

“Does light travel in all directions at the same speed?” Buzz said.

“Certainly,” the teacher said.

“What is the distance between light and dark?” Buzz said.

“I don’t understand?” the teacher said.

“Dark is always ahead of light,” Buzz said. “You walk into a room and it’s dark. How’d the dark get there so fast. If I can travel faster than the speed of light, where am I? I’m in the dark. How’d dark get there so fast. I’d like to know how fast a dark-year is.”

The teacher tilted his head in disbelief and stared to beyond.

Buzz waved his hand in front the teachers gaze. “Ya know, I think it’s cool you holding down a job as a teacher and working nights here at the Burger Barn, but what I really want to know is how long will light from those heat lights keep my burger and fries fresh?”

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